SCOTT AND BRIAN, BABY-FACED ANARCHISTS

Self-proclaimed anarchists Scott and Brian, both 18, made their contribution to saving America from Chimpy's evil influence by burning a few flags. The problem is, at the time the flags were torched they were flying from poles attached to houses. Both acknowledge they were aware that the houses could have burned with residents possibly inside. Arson being a serious crime these two morons will probably, fortunately, be locked away for some serious time.