TROUBLES DROWNED

Europeans shouldn't worry about rising sea levels killing them, not when they're already drowning in alcohol:

According to the World Health Organisation (WHO), Europeans drink twice as much as people on other continents, with an alcohol-related annual death toll of over 600,000.

Perhaps conscious of the bleak social and economic future confronting them, European kiddies are getting right into the booze:

Teenagers, and in particular young girls, across the whole bloc drink large amounts of alcohol several times a month, and the average age for the first drink has fallen from 15 years for the parent generation to 11.8 years for the teenagers of today.

Drinking will be even more hazardous to the health of Europeans once sharia law is enacted.