ROUGH PLAY PROMPTS RULE CHANGE

Following his recent abuse directed at bushfire survivor Liam Sheahan, Melbourne lawyer Jeremy Sear was contacted by a woman who is apparently Sheahan’s sister.

Colleen wanted Jeremy to justify his abuse (“git”, “not one of Saturday’s heroes”, “arrogant twat”). Jeremy responded, as he usually does when cornered, by inventing a rule of acceptable behaviour:

I disagreed with him, and with those who are declaring that the fires prove him “right" in what he did. He's putting himself out there as a political figure now, making demands - such as getting his fine returned - and trying to get his own back on the people who opposed his campaign.

At which point he lost the victim shield of immunity from criticism.

Just in case it’s not clear, Jeremy restates his rule:

And, as I said, once you start pushing a political barrow - which he is - and attacking other people - which he is - you lose your victim's shield of immunity. You are a fair target.

The people Sheahan “attacked” were bureaucrats who cost him $100,000 for removing trees from his land in a bid to safeguard his family and property. The “political barrow” he pushed was to mention council wimpishness in the face of Green pressures. For this – remember, he’s just one week on from fighting a blaze that could have killed his whole family – Jeremy calls him a “git” (before deleting that slur).

Jeremy invents rules of behaviour all the time, and the strange thing is that they always end up justifying… Jeremy. He has rules that justify breaching copyright (for videogames, comedy programs and music that he wants for free) while at the same time he threatens people who publish his copyrighted cat pictures.

He has rules that justify him attacking the professional life of others while maintaining that his own professional life should be off-limits.

He has rules that condemn others for expressing opinions anonymously while being for a long time anonymous himself.

It’s sad that so many of Jeremy’s rules – he has more rules than the Koran – have been lost due to the mysterious erasing of all of his comments a few weeks ago. That’s where self-justifying Jeremy was at his peak.

But look at this. After outlining his latest rule, that people who push political barrows have lost their “shield of immunity” and are “fair targets”, here's how Jeremy – who pushes political barrows all the time – responds to Colleen’s criticism:

What's with the "little man" shit, Colleen?

Oh dear. Jeremy has been insulted. It just isn’t fair.

Update: When a rule change won't fix the problem Jeremy denies saying what he said, and keeps denying it. Do they teach that at lawyer school?

Update II: Lawyer Jeremy reacts to a ticket from an airport parking officer by "naming the chap, identifying him by photograph, and describing him as a 'miserable bastard', a 'vindictive twerp', a 'petty tyrant', a 'prick. and an 'arsehole''. (Thanks to reader pogria for reminding us of this moment from Jeremy's rich history.)